第十一章

???云???漪???最???终???仍???是???决???定???进???g0ng???见???啓???桓???。

???如???果???没???有???与???紫???曦???见???过???面???她???是???真???的???打???算???放???弃???的???，???是???紫???曦???的???劝?????让???她???正???视???自???己???实???在???是???疯???狂???想???念???啓???桓???的???事???实???。

???两???天???後???，???在???紫???曦???的???安???排???下???跟???着???沁???婷???来???到???了???啓???桓???住???的???景???福???g0ng???，???g0ng???门???外???，???紫???曦???微???笑???着???迎???接???她???们???。

???「???啓???桓???他???…???…???现???在???怎???麽???样???了???？???」

???「???还???是???昏???迷???着???。???」???紫???曦???看???着???云???漪???和???沁???婷???，???「???你???快???进???去???看???看???殿???下???吧???，???皇???上???近???日???出???访???北???欧???不???在???g0ng???里???，???太???后???娘???娘???与???皇???后???娘???娘???早???些???时???候???已???来???探???视???过???太???子???，???现???在???都???在???咸???若???馆???礼???佛???，???所???以???应???该???也???不???会???再???过???来???了???，???你???就???安???心???的???去???见???太???子???吧???。???」

???「???谢???谢???你???，???紫???曦???。???」???云???漪???充???满???感???激???地???看???着???紫???曦???，???诚???心???诚???意???的?????。

???「???别???这???麽?????，???这???是???我???该???做???的???，???快???进???去???吧???。???」?????完???看???向???沁???婷???，???「???我???想???到???处???走???走???，???沁???婷???你???要???一???起???来???吗???？???」

???沁???婷???看???看???紫???曦???，???轻???轻???摇???头???，???「???我???还???是???待???在???这???儿???好???了???，???若???是???有???什???麽???状???况???也???好???通???知???云???漪???。???」

???就???这???样???，???紫???曦???离???开???了???景???福???g0ng???，???而???云???漪???也???进???了???啓???桓???的???寝???g0ng???内???。

???走???进???啓???桓???的???寝???室???，???云???漪???一???眼???就???看???见???了???躺???在???床???上???的???啓???桓???，???缓???缓???走???向???床???边???，???终???於???见???到???思???念???已???久???的???啓???桓???。

???凝???视???着???啓???桓???的???憔???悴???病???容???，???云???漪???感???到???心???痛???又???自???责???，???泪???水???同???时???夺???眶???而???出???。

???「???啓???桓???，???你???醒???醒???，???我???来???了???，???你???醒???来???看???看???我???啊???。???」???云???漪???一???手???握???着???啓???桓???的???手???，???一???手???小???心???翼???翼???地???抚???着???他???消???瘦???的???脸???。

???「???啓???桓???，???你???醒???来???吧???，???我???答???应???你???，???我???不???会???在???逃???避???你???了???，???你???醒???来???吧???…???…???」

???云???漪???边?????边???落???泪???，???不???断???坠???落???地???泪???水???一???颗???颗???的???落???在???啓???桓???的???脸???上???。

???而???此???时???的???啓???桓???正???在???做???梦???，???梦???里???他???在???雨???中???奔???跑???着???。

???「???云???漪???你???出???来???，???我???求???求???你???，???云???漪???不???要???再???躲???避???我???。???」???啓???桓???不???停???地???喊???着???云???漪???的???名???字???。

???「???啓???桓???…???…???」

???「???云???漪???，???是???你???吗???？???」???听???见???了???云???漪???的???声???音???，???啓???桓???四???处???寻???找???，???却???未???看???见???云???漪???的???身???影???。

???「???云???漪???，???你???在???哪???里???？???你???快???出???来???吧???，???我???不???能???失???去???你???。???」???听???见???云???漪???一???声???声???唤???着???他???，???却???始???终???不???见???云???漪???，???他???急???了???。

???「???我???在???这???儿???，???啓???桓???，???我???一???直???都???在???这???儿???啊???。???」

???在???哪???儿???呢???？???云???漪???，???你???到???底???在???哪???儿???呢???？

???啓???桓???不???断???地???找???寻???云???漪???，???此???时???大???雨???已???渐???渐???缓???和???了???下???来???，???只???剩???几???滴???小???雨???，???零???零???落???落???地???落???在???啓???桓???的???脸???上???。

???「???啓???桓???，???你???听???得???见???我???吗???？???啓???桓???你???醒???醒???，???你???睁???开???眼???看???看???我???。???」

???听???见???一???声???声???的???呼???唤???，???啓???桓???终???於???缓???缓???地???睁???开???了???眼???…???…

???一???睁???开???眼???便???看???见???他???思???念???已???久???的???云???漪???就???在???他???面???前???，???含???泪???凝???望???着???自???己???。

???「???云???漪???…???…???是???你???吗???？???真???的???是???你???吗???？???还???是???我???在???做???梦???？???」???啓???桓???声???音???虚???弱???的???问???，???盯???着???云???漪???不???敢???移???开???目???光???，???他???怕???这???只???是???场???梦???，???等???他???一???眨???眼???，???眼???前???的???人???又???消???失???无???踪???。

???「???啓???桓???你???总???算???醒???了???。???」???云???漪???痴???痴???的???看???着???啓???桓???，???紧???握???他???的???手???，???「???是???我???，???真???的???是???我???，???你???不???是???在???做???梦???，???啓???桓???对???不???起???，???是???我???不???好???，???啓???桓???我???答???应???你???，???我???不???会???再???逃???避???你???了???。???」

???「???云???漪???…???…???」???确???定???自???己???不???是???在???做???梦???，???撑???着???虚???弱???的???身???t???起???身???，???将???云???漪???拥???入???怀???里???。

???这???次???他???无???论???如???何???都???不???会???再???放???开???她???了???。

???

???离???开???景???福???g0ng???後???，???紫???曦???不???知???不???觉???地???走???到???了???御???花???园???，???身???後???跟???着???靳???常???在???。

???「???这\???里???头???现???在???应???该???是???空???着???的???吧???？???」???站???在???御???花???园???里???的???绦???雪???轩???前???，???紫???曦???似???乎???在???想???着???什???麽???？

???这???个???地???方???…???…???有???她???对???g0ng???里???最???深???的???记???忆???。

???「???是???的???，???娘???娘???要???进???去???看???吗???？???」

???紫???曦???抬???头???望???着???绦???雪???轩???的???匾???额???，???微???笑???道???，???「???进???去???吧???，???我???想???看???看???。???」

???走???进???绦???雪???轩???，???熟???悉???的???感???觉???涌???上???紫???曦???的???心???头???，???这???里???就???如???同???当???年???，???依???旧???的???古???朴???素???雅???。

???「???这???儿???，???一???点???都???没???变???啊???。???」???紫???曦???环???望???四???周???，???喃???喃???地?????。

???当???年???在???g0ng???里???小???住???几???日???，???除???了???承???乾???g0ng???，???她???最???常???来???的???就???是???这???儿???了???。

???当???年???，???总???是???由???啓???枢???阿???哥???带???着???她???来???到???这???儿???，???他?????他???喜???欢???这???里???的???幽???静???典???雅???，???於???是???他???们???经???常???来???这???儿???。

???「???紫???曦???你???又???赢???了???。???」???啓???枢???的???声???音???彷???佛???就???在???她???耳???边???回???响???。

???当???年???他???们???最???喜???欢???在???绦???雪???轩???的???亭???子???里???下???棋???聊???天???，???两???人???的???棋???艺???差???不???多???，???但???往???往???啓???枢???都???会???让???她???。

???「???靳???常???在???，???我???想???一???个???人???在???这???逛???逛???，???你???先???回???去???吧???。???」

???「???是???，???娘???娘???。???」?????完???，???靳???常???在???便???转???身???离???去???。

???靳???常???在???离???去???後???，???紫???曦???蹲???下???身???子???，???仔???细???观???望???那???数???棵???如???雪???片???般???的???海???棠???花???。

???「???好???美???，???你???们???还???是???被???照???料???的???很???完???善???呢???。???」???紫???曦???低???喃???，???心???里???不???禁???赞???许???细???心???照???顾???这???些???海???棠???花???的???人???。???接???着???她???起???身???想???到???别???处???走???走???，???就???在???这???时???她???的???目???光???却???不???经???意???的???飘???向???不???远???处???的???一???座???亭???子???，???一???个???年???轻???男???孩???伫???立???在???亭???中???，???眼???神???遥???望???远???处???，???大???概???是???想???事???情???想???的???出???神???，???因???此???没???发???现???紫???曦???。

???是???啓???枫???吗???？???他???怎???麽???会???在???这???呢???？

???由???於???只???看???到???男???孩???的???侧???面???，???所???以???紫???曦???看???出???那???是???个???年???轻???男???孩???，???g0ng???里???除???了???啓???桓???，???这???个???年???轻???男???孩???应???该???就???是???啓???枫???了???吧???？

???在???紫???曦???的???的???印???象???中???，???啓???枫???是???个???冷???静???不???多???话???的???男???孩???，???当???年???她???与???啓???枫???并???未???见???过???几???次???面???，???更???别?????是???谈???话???了???。???自???从???她???嫁???入???g0ng???里???也???几???乎???没???见???过???啓???枫???，???她???想???，???既???然???都???要???待???在???g0ng???里???，???那???麽???她???也???该???认???识???认???识???啓???枫???。

???「???你???是???二???阿???哥???吗???？???」

???听???见???紫???曦???的???声???音???，???背???对???着???紫???曦???的???男???孩???整???个???人???僵???住???了???，???过???了???一???段???时???间???，???男???孩???才???慢???慢???的???转???过???身???面???对???紫???曦???，???两???人???的???目???光???就???这???麽???接???触???了──

???「???你???…???…???」???看???着???男???孩???的???面???容???，???紫???曦???心???里???不???禁???感???到???大???大???的???震???动???，???这???男???孩???好???像???啓???枢???，???尤???其???是???那???双???眼???睛???！???但???是???有???可???能???吗???？???啓???枢???哥???出???现???在???g0ng???里???出???现???在???她???的???面???前???？???还???是???他???真???的???是???啓???枫???，???只???是???跟???啓???枢???哥???长???得???相???似???罢???了???？???毕???竟???他???们???是???堂???兄???弟???，???长???得???像???也???不???奇???怪???。

???两???人???就???这???麽???对???望???了???一???段???时???间???。

???「???很???抱???歉???，???太???子???妃???娘???娘???，???微???臣???是???二???阿???哥???的???侍???卫???，???并???非???二???阿???哥???。???」???男???孩???垂???着???眼???，???平???淡???恭???敬???的???语???调???中???有???着???紫???曦???未???发???觉???的???激???动???。

???原???来???他???不???是???啓???枫???，???更???不???是???啓???枢???哥???。

???一???gu???失???望???的???感???觉???涌???上???心???头???。

???是???啊???，???他???不???可???能???是???啓???枢???哥???。???紫???曦???记???忆???中???的???啓???枢???是???个???总???是???带???着???笑???容???的???开???朗???男???孩???，???而???眼???前???这???个???男???孩???眉???宇???之???间???所???散???发???的???皆???是???严???谨???而???又???忧???郁???的???气???息???。

???他?????他???是???二???阿???哥???的???侍???卫???，???但???是???他???看???起???来???这???麽???年???轻???，???顶???多???大???她???一???、???两???岁???，???g0ng???里???的???侍???卫???最???少???也???要???有???大???学???毕???业???不???是???吗???？???他???应???该???还???是???个???中???学???生???吧???？

???「???你???是???二???阿???哥???的???侍???卫???，???那???麽???你???怎???麽???会???在???这???儿???呢???？???」???是???跟???啓???枫???一???起???来???的???吗???？???怎???麽???不???见???啓???枫???？???「???你???…???…???进???g0ng???里???很???久???了???吗???？???」???紫???曦???不???由???自???主???地???多???问???了???一???句???。

???「???苍???尧???在???我???的???身???边???一???年???了???。???」???一???个???的???冷???冷???的???嗓???音???从???紫???曦???身???後???传???来???，???紫???曦???转???过???身???，???就???看???见???一???个???神???情???冷???漠???的???男???孩???走???过???来???，???他???才???是???啓???枫???吧???？

???「???太???子???妃???娘???娘???。???」???啓???枫???向???紫???曦???微???微???点???了???个???头???，???算???是???打???了???招???呼???。

???「???这???里???的???环???境???好???，???我???一???向???喜???欢???来???这???里???看???书???。???」???啓???枫???看???着???紫???曦???，???意???有???所???指???的???问???，???「???那???麽???，???不???知???太???子???妃???娘???娘???今???天???怎???麽???会???到???这???来???？???」?????完???还???不???经???意???地???瞄???了???一???眼???苍???尧???。

???紫???曦???并???未???察???觉???啓???枫???的???话???中???有???话???及???古???怪???的???神???se???，???微???笑???道???，???「???算???是???一???时???兴???起???吧???，???或???者???也???可???以?????来???这???找???些???回???忆???。???」

???「???找???回???忆???？???」???啓???枫???扬???起???了???眉???毛???，???而???站???在???他???一???旁???的???苍???尧???神???情???则???有???着???难???以???言???喻???的???变???化???。

???「???是???啊???，???找???回???忆???。???」???紫???曦?????着???，???眼???神???迷???离???的???看???了???看???四???周???，???「???当???年???在???g0ng???里???，???除???了???承???乾???g0ng???，???就???属???这???个???地???方???让???我???的???印???象???最???深???刻???了???，???不???知???我???来???这???儿???是???不???是???打???扰???到???你???了???？???若???是???这???样???，???真???的???很???抱???歉???。???」

???「???不???会???的???，???太???子???妃???娘???娘???，???这???个???地???方???只???要???您???高???兴???随???时???都???可???以???来???。???」???啓???枫???心???里???同???时???略???微???感???到???些???许???意???外???，???很???少???会???有???跟???他???不???太???熟???、???而???他???也???很???难???得???会???与???自???己???不???熟???的???人???这???麽???自???在???的?????话???，???大???部???份???的???人???都???因???为???自???己???的???冷???酷???而???与???他???保???持???距???离???，???除???了???…???…???一???个???聒???噪???的???小ㄚ???头???，???再???有???就???是???眼???前???的???这???位???太???子???妃???娘???娘???，???这???对???董???鄂???家???的???姊???妹???真???是???特???别???的???。

???「???娘???娘???，???二???阿???哥???吉???祥???。???」???此???时???，???靳???常???在???走???了???过???来???，???向???啓???枫???请???安???後???再???转???身???面???对???紫???曦???，???「???刚???才???慈???宁???g0ng???的???耿???常???在???来???报???，?????是???太???后???娘???娘???准???备???要???前???往???景???福???g0ng???。???」

???「???是???吗???？???那???我???得???先???去???迎???接???皇???n???n???才???行???。???」???在???啓???枫???与???苍???尧???面???前???，???紫???曦???一???脸???镇???定???，???她???必???须???先???前???往???慈???宁???g0ng???拖???住???太???后???，???「???我???先???走???了???，???有???机???会???再???聊???。???」???临???行???前???，???不???自???觉???地???再???望???了???苍???尧???一???眼???才???翩???然???而???去???。

???望???着???紫???曦???与???靳???常???在???走???远???的???背???影???，???啓???枫???这???才???露???出???了???个???似???笑???非???笑???的???表???情???。

???「???她?????她???来???这???儿???找???回???忆???，???你???觉???得???是???什???麽???？???」???他???当???然???知???道???紫???曦???所?????的???回???忆???是???什???麽???，???对???於???当???年???苍???尧???与???紫???曦???的???交???情???他???虽???然???没???有???很???清???楚???，???但???总???会???听???到???一???些???关???於???他???们???的???事???，???再???加???上???苍???尧???回???来???後???对???紫???曦???种???种???关???心???与???不???舍???的???表???现???，???他???看???着???自???然???也???看???明???白???了???。

???「???看???来???，???嫂???子???的???心???里???始???终???没???有???忘???记???你???。???」

???「???我?????过???，???她???是???太???子???妃???，???而???我???只???是???g0ng???中???的???侍???卫???。???」

???啓???枫???用???一???种???奇???异???而???锐???利???的???眼???神???看???了???他???好???一???会???儿???，???才???慢???慢???地?????了???一???句???：???「???这???不???像???你???。???」

???始???终???面???无???表???情???的???苍???尧???，???这???时???脸???上???闪???过???一???丝???复???杂???神???se???，???虽???然???是???一???闪???而???过???，???却???也???没???逃???过???啓???枫???的???眼???睛???，???他???看???出???苍???尧???隐???藏???在???心???底???的???感???情???与???仇???恨???。

???「???在???当???年???亲???眼???目???睹???母???亲???si???亡???的???那???一???刻???起???，???就???已???注???定???我???不???会???再???是???原???来???的???我???了???。???」???是???的???，???当???年???母???亲???上???吊???自???杀???他???都???看???见???了???。

???啓???枫???嘴???角???微???微???上???扬???，???缓???缓???跟???上???苍???尧???，???心???里???却???已???有???了???盘???算???。

???或???许???，???就???像???苍???尧???自???己???所?????的???，???在???亲???眼???目???睹???母???亲???的???si???亡???，???因???而???无???法???回???到???原???来???的???自???己???，???那???是???可???以???理???解???的???。???但???就???算???如???此???，???他???也???一???定???会???想???办???法???，???让???苍???尧???认???清???自???己???对???紫???曦???的???感???情???。

???「???紫???曦???是???个???很???好???很???迷???人???的???nv???孩???。???」

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???「???我???一???向???不???喜???欢???吵???闹???。???」???啓???枫???一???边?????，???一???边???往???北???岸???的???方???向???走???去???，???兰???熙???自???然???是???跟???了???上???去???，???「???但???是???很???奇???怪???，???对???於???那???天???你???在???我???身???边???像???麻???雀???般???的???吵???个???不???停???，???我???非???但???没???有???不???高???兴???的???感???觉???，???反???而???还???很???希???望???你???可???以???这???样???一???直???在???我???身???边???吵???下???去???…???…???」

???跟???着???啓???枫???的???脚???步???，???兰???熙???静???静???的???听???。

???「???起???初???，???我???只???当???你???是???因???为???不???知???道???我???的???身???份???才???敢???如???此???，???毕???竟???，???从???没???有???人???敢???在???我???这???个???阿???哥???的???面???前???多???话???，???後???来???，???你???留???在???g0ng???里???的???期???间???，???我???到???现???在???都???还???记???得???那???段???日???子???，???你???每???天???来???未???央???g0ng???，???在???我???的???身???旁???绕???来???绕???去???、???问???东???问???西???的???模???样???，???留???给???了???我???很???深???刻???的???印???象???，???在???g0ng???里???，???除???了???啓???枢???和???昱???翔???，???也???就???只???有???你???让???我???有???朋???友???的???感???觉???。???」

???朋???友???？???啓???枫???哥???把???她???当???朋???友???？

???「???後???来???，???发???生???戊???寅???事???件???，???皇???祖???父???过???世???、???啓???枢???失???踪???，???我???的???父???亲???继???承???皇???位???，???原???本???以???为???，???父???皇???和???母???后???会???对???我???这???个???自???幼???就???入???g0ng???的???小???儿???子???给???予???从???未???有???过???的???关???ai???，???但???我???错???了???，???父???皇???和???母???后???的???心???里???只???有???当???了???太???子???的???大???儿???子???，???就???连???皇???n???n???也???是???如???此???，???不???知???道???是???从???什???麽???时???候???起???，???我???也???就???不???再???奢???望???能???够???得???到???长???辈???们???的???关???注???，???几???年???下???来???，???唯???一???让???我???想???起???会???感???到???温???暖???的???…???…???就???是???你???在???g0ng???里???的???那???段???日???子???…???…???」

???兰???熙???睁???着???一???双???迷???蒙???似???水???的???眼???望???着???啓???枫???，???她???从???没???看???过???这???样???的???啓???枫???，???也???从???来???不???知???道???，???原???来???贵???为???皇???阿???哥???的???啓???枫???，???也???有???着???不???受???父???母???亲???疼???ai???的???烦???恼???。

???兰???熙???的???凝???视???，???让???啓???枫???原???本???平???静???的???心???起???了???波???澜???。

???此???时???，???他???们???已???来???到???北???海???最???美???的???园???中???之???园──???静???心???斋???，???两???人???的???距???离???也???拉???近???了???些???。

???「???也???就???是???从???那???时???起???，???我???一???直???在???期???待???着???…???…???期???待???你???再???次???进???g0ng???，???期???待???你???在???我???身???边???晃???来???晃???去???。???因???为???，???只???有???如???此???我???的???心???才???会???有???自???己???还???存???在???的???真???实???感???。???」

???啓???枫???瞅???着???她???，???眼???里???充???满???了???从???未???有???过???的???热???烈???情???感???，???看???得???兰???熙???心???头???怦???怦???跳???。

???「???啓???枫???哥???…???…???」???两???人???互???相???望???着???对???方???，???此???时???的???兰???熙???已???无???法???思???考???，???全???身???像???是???在???啓???枫???的???凝???视???下???僵???化???般???地???动???弹???不???得???。

???而???啓???枫???则???是???越???来???越???靠???近???她???。

???「???兰???熙???，???我???发???现???…???…???我???已???经???ai???上???了???你???…???…???」

???

???九???月???的???最???後???一???个???假???日???。

???首???都???机???场???人???cha0???众???多???，???其???中???包???括???了???送???云???漪???出???国???的???啓???桓???、???紫???曦???和???沁???婷???等???人???。

???「???一???定???要???等???我???，???云???漪???，???相???信???我???，???我???一???定???会???请???求???父???皇???废???了???我???的???皇???太???子???之???位???，???到???时???後???我???们???就???可???以???真???真???正???正???的???在???一???起???。???」

???「???啓???桓???。???」???看???着???啓???桓???，???云???漪???的???心???是???又???感???动???又???担???心???，???担???心???啓???桓???是???否???会???为???了???自???己???做???出???什???麽???冲???动???的???事???，???「???我???相???信???你???，???我???也???一???定???会???等???你???，???那???麽???我???也???请???你???答???应???我???，???一???定???要???好???好???保???重???自???己???，???好???吗???？???」

???啓???桓???满???眼???不???舍???的???盯???着???云???漪???，???此???时???他???真???想???将???她???紧???拥???入???怀???，???但???他???不???能???这???麽???做???，???今???天???他???之???所???以???还???能???来???送???云???漪???，???也???都???是???因???为???紫???曦???在???长???辈???们???面???前???再???三???保???证???，???他???们???只???是???纯???粹???以???朋???友???的???身???份???送???云???漪???，???再???加???上???沁???婷???、???恒???锐???等???人???都???跟???着???，???长???辈???们???才???放???心???让???他???来???。

???「???啓???桓???哥???，???我???能???和???云???漪?????几???句???话???吗???？???」???看???着???他???们???依???依???不???舍???的???模???样???，???紫???曦???实???在???不???忍???打???断???他???们???，???但???时???间???有???限???，???她???也???想???和???云???漪?????些???话???。

???「???当???然???可???以???。???」???云???漪???望???着???紫???曦???笑???道???，???两???人???便???走???到???另???一???处?????话???。

???紫???曦???拿???出???了???一???条???银???链???子???，???上???头???串???着???一???颗???粉???neng???的???水???晶???珠???子???，???「???这???个???是???我???亲???手???做???的???。???」???边?????边???摇???着???手???上???的???水???晶???手???链???给???她???看???，???「???这???颗???珠???子???是???我???从???这???条???手???链???拿???下???来???的???一???颗???，???可???能???对???你???来?????它???很???普???通???，???但???对???我???来?????它???是???最???珍???贵???的???，???所???以???我???把???它???送???给???你???，???希???望???它???能???代???表???我???对???你???祝???福???。???」

???接???过???链???子???，???云???漪???深???深???的???看???着???紫???曦???，???心???底???早???已???认???定???这???个???朋???友???，???「???谢???谢???你???，???紫???曦???，???有???这???条???链???子???和???你???的???祝???福???就???b???任???何???东???西???都???还???珍???贵???了???，???我???一???定???会???好???好???珍???藏???着???。???」

???两???个???nv???孩???相???视???而???笑???。

???这???时???，???紫???曦???俯???靠???云???漪???的???耳???边???低???语???，???「???我???相???信???你???和???啓???桓???哥???很???快???就???会???再???重???逢???的???，???偷???偷???告???诉???你???一???个???秘???密???，???其???实???我???已???经???有???了???心???上???人???，???我???心???里???的???这???个???人???，???就???像???你???对???啓???桓???哥???、???啓???桓???哥???对???你???一???样???，???是???今???生???今???世???都???不???会???改???变???了???。???所???以???你???千???万???别???对???我???感???到???抱???歉???，???啓???桓???哥???注???定???是???属???於???你???的???，???明???白???吗???？???」

???云???漪???惊???奇???的???看???着???紫???曦???，???原???来???紫???曦???一???直???知???道???自???己???的???顾???虑???，???她???是???真???心???的???把???紫???曦???当???朋???友???，???因???此???她???的???潜???意???识???始???终???告???诉???自???己???，???无???论???啓???桓???如???何???ai???她???，???但???终???究???他???与???紫???曦???是???夫???妻???身???份???，???所???以???假???如???有???天???他???们???对???彼???此???有???了???感???情???，???那???麽???她???会???退???出???的???，???然???而???紫???曦???今???天???告???诉???她???这???件???事???是???真???的???还???是???只???是???要???令???她???安???心???呢???？

???望???了???眼???紫???曦???戴???在???手???上???的???水???晶???手???链???，???她???似???乎???明???白???了???，???难???道???…???…???那???条???手???链???就???是???紫???曦???的???心???上???人???送???给???她???的???？

???看???着???云???漪???望???着???自???己???手???上???的???链???子???，???再???以???充???满???疑???问???的???眼???神???看???着???自???己???，???紫???曦???只???是???微???笑???不???语???。

???「???云???漪???时???间???到???了???，???你???该???入???关???了???。???」???这???时???沁???婷???走???过???来???提???醒???。

???云???漪???点???点???头???，???看???着???众???人???，???最???後???的???目???光???则???是???停???留???在???啓???桓???身???上???。

???「???谢???谢???你???们???今???天???来???送???我???，???有???你???们???这???些???好???朋???友???，???我???真???的???感???到???很???幸???福???。???」?????到???这???里???，???云???漪???看???了???紫???曦???一???眼???，???「???那???麽???，???我???走???了???，???你???们???也???都???要???保???重???。???」

???即???使???再???怎???麽???不???舍???，???终???究???还???是???要???离???别???，???但???是???这???样???她???便???满???足???了???，???毕???竟???最???初???她???是???打???算???只???带???着???对???啓???桓???的???回???忆???静???静???离???开???，???只???是???没???想???到???认???识???了???紫???曦???，???紫???曦???是???她???与???啓???桓???感???情???里???的???奇???蹟???。

???再???看???着???大???夥???儿???，???云???漪???就???这???麽???带???着???啓???桓???的???ai???、???紫???曦???的???祝???福???、???众???人???的???友???谊???，???依???依???不???舍???的???离???开???了???。

慈宁g0ng。

这夜，完颜太后睡的不安稳，彷佛是做了恶梦，惊醒後就无法再入睡。

「皇nn，紫曦是我的福晋啊！您怎麽能把我的福晋指给啓桓呢？」

这是在太后的梦里记得最清楚的话，说这话的不是别人，正是她最疼ai最思念的皇孙啓枢。

「唉。」看着啓枢小时候的照片，太后眼眶不禁盈满泪水，「枢儿啊，你究竟是生是si？如今在何处？这些年是怎麽过的呢？皇nn好真的想你啊，若是平安成长，你现在也有十八岁了，是忘了亲人而无法回来？还是因为怨恨父母亲的si不愿回来呢？可怜的孩子啊。」

梦里的小啓枢不断埋怨她将紫曦指婚给啓桓，她疼ai啓枢，b疼任何一个皇孙还疼ai这个孙子，因此她的心里决定，若是有一天啓枢出现告诉她要紫曦做自己的媳妇，并且紫曦也愿意，那麽她一定会不顾一切地成全他们，这也是她并未让啓桓与紫曦大婚就圆房的原因之一，一方面，她只是希望藉由这个婚礼让啓桓忘掉叶赫那拉家的nv孩，只要夫妻两人相处和睦，圆房也是迟早的事，她也明白时代毕竟已和从前不同，除非是不得已，她实在也不愿b着孩子们。

很快的，到了传统三大节庆之一的中秋节。

一早，皇室成员们皆穿着正式服装举行中秋贺礼仪式，接着就前往宗庙举行祭礼，几乎忙碌了一整天，下午总算能稍做休息，再来就是准备晚上的中秋晚宴了。

晚宴在太后的慈宁g0ng举行，皇室成员们围坐在一张圆桌子上，太后居中坐在上位，右边是皇帝皇后，再来是皇太子夫妇啓桓与紫曦，啓枫则是坐在啓桓的身边，与长辈们面对着。

「这是太子妃嫁入g0ng里参与的第一个庆典，今天想必累坏了吧？」太后满脸慈ai的看着紫曦说。

「不会的，皇nn，今天对我来说还是新奇的一天，我觉得很高兴，又怎麽会感到累呢。」

「新奇？」

「是啊，皇nn，像这样的庆典，以往都只能在电视上或在g0ng廷周围观望，如今我也成了要为这些庆典而忙碌的一份子，对我来说当然是新奇的啊。」紫曦望着太后微笑，声音清脆的说。

「太子妃还真的会说话呢。」太后满意的点着头，就看着紫曦与啓桓说道，「能看到你们和睦相处，这是再好不过的事，也让哀家放心了不少啊。」

太后这麽一说，皇帝与皇后也同意的笑了，啓桓与紫曦两人互看了一眼，虽然笑着，心里却不免有些心虚，而一旁的啓枫则是脸上带着微笑，眼里却略过若有似乎的嘲讽。

「下个月就是二阿哥十八岁的生辰，皇帝是不是也该给二阿哥册封爵位了呢？」这时太后突然将话题转移到啓枫身上。

「母后说的是，这件事儿臣已经在准备了。」皇帝也看着啓枫说道。

「那麽，要不要顺便办婚礼呢？啓枫也到了该成亲的年龄了啊。」皇后接着说。

这时长辈们的焦点话题都在啓枫身上，这让他有些讶异也有些飘飘然，表面上仍是不动声se的听着。

「也对。」太后看着啓枫，「不知二阿哥心里是否有中意的人呢？若是有，就让你在封爵後准备婚礼，届时可能会忙碌一阵子。」

毕竟与啓桓的情况不同，若是啓枫还没有对象，长辈们是不会b他成亲的。

「有。」啓枫说。

在坐的人都感到好奇，不知是哪个nv孩能够让啓枫看上？

「哦？是哪家的格格？」

「这个……现在还不是说的时候。」啓枫看着太后、皇帝皇后，恭敬的说，「但是我保证这个nv孩一定会令你们满意的。」

宣和七年十一月十号

啓枫十八岁生日这天，正式被册封为颖亲王。原本，册封爵位的皇子必须要搬出g0ng廷，但宣和皇帝为啓枫准备的新府邸还未整修完成，因此在府邸整修完毕之前，啓枫仍是继续住在g0ng里。

当晚，在他预料之中，他的太子哥哥啓桓来到了他的未央g0ng。

「恭喜你了，啓枫。」

「哥，你是不是有什麽事想说？」啓枫平静的看着啓桓。

「还记得当时在承德别墅我向你提过的事吧？」

啓枫低头沉思了一段时间，「我想先听听你打算怎麽做？」

「我本来想，等父皇册封你亲王後就和紫曦离婚，并请父皇废了我的太子之位，然後我再到奥地利去找云漪。」

「事情不会这麽顺利的。」啓枫摇摇头，「首先，光是和太子妃离婚这件事就很困难，现在不只在皇室，甚至在民众的心目中太子妃是完美的，她的声望甚至b你这个太子还高。」

「所以？」

「所以你和太子妃要离婚，但不能公开离，至少在你出国前不能让长辈们知道。再来，你要以留学的名义出国，而且不能去奥地利，你总不会以为你要出国，长辈们不会调查叶赫那拉家那nv孩在哪个国家念书吧？要是让长辈们查到你要去的国家她也在那儿，我想你恐怕也是去不了的。」

「你的意思，是要我瞒着长辈们？」他知道提出和太子妃离婚必会引起轩然大波，但他怎麽也没想过要用这种欺瞒的方法，他要正大光明的和云漪在一起。

「现在也只有这个方法不是吗？」啓枫提醒着，「别的先不说，太子妃就快满十八了吧？你们……还没圆房不是吗？」眼见啓桓脸se一变，他又继续说，「总之，我可以帮你想办法，只是你自己要再想清楚，如果真想和那nv孩在一起，有些难关是你们必须要面对的，没有十全十美的事。」

看着啓桓似乎已同意自己的建议，啓枫露出了个啓桓未查觉的狡黠笑容。他明白他这位太子哥哥一心一意只想和叶赫那拉家那nv孩在一起，因此他的意见啓桓百分之十是会听的。现在只要把啓桓送出国，接下来就剩他那亲ai的侍卫堂哥和太子妃了。

未央g0ng

「那老头还在外面？」

晚上七点，刚用过晚膳，啓枫在自己的寝g0ng里看书，过了一段时间，他才冷声问外头的侍卫。

「回王爷，霍爵爷现在还在外头候着。」

「呵，他可真有耐x啊。」啓枫冷笑，眼里带着诡谲的嘲讽。。

今天是假日，一早侍卫便向他通报霍丞要求见他，不用想也知道这老头的来意，这早就在他的预料之中，册封亲王後，这老头肯定会有所行动，只是早晚的问题。无所谓，他压根儿没把霍老头看在眼里。

这天很冷，他就故意让霍丞在外等候一整天，既然这老头真敢来要胁他，那麽他也不必客气。

「让他进来吧。」若不是想赶紧把事情给解决掉，那老头就算冷si在外面他也懒得管。

「是。」

不久，在侍卫的带领下霍丞被带到大厅，啓枫就坐在这儿等着。

「参见王爷。」也许是心虚，霍丞根本不敢正眼看啓枫。

「都下去吧。」冷声吩咐着。

未赐坐，也没吩咐内侍常在准备茶水，让霍丞站在儿，摆明就是要给他难堪。

「不知霍子爵此时入g0ng有什麽事？」很明显地故意装做不知道霍丞一早就等候在外的事实。

「是……是这样的王爷……」怎麽回事儿？他今儿个应该是来谈条件的，怎麽会怕起眼前这曾是他的学生，年纪也足以做他儿子的毛头小子？

说到底还不都是为了他那个宝贝nv儿敏佳。

敏佳从小就想嫁入皇室，发生戊寅g0ng变前，人们理所当然的都认为当时的皇太子恒铭之子啓枢将是未来的皇位继承人之一，也因此敏佳一心就将啓枢当做对象。因为父亲是啓枢与啓枫师傅的关系，敏佳曾入过g0ng两三次，所以对啓枢与啓枫b较有印象，戊寅g0ng变後，啓枢失踪，敏佳并未把目标转到成为皇太子的啓桓身上，反而一心一意的想成为啓枫的福晋。

若是啓枢阿哥倒还好，但这啓枫阿哥就……

唉……

霍丞这时不得不承认，他确实是挺怕这小子的。

不为别的，就为他身上所散发出的那gu邪气，还有那双凌厉冷酷的眼神。

好b此刻，在啓枫寒凛的注视下，他还是得y着头皮将准备许久的台词说出来。

「微臣最近收到一个消息……事实上，微臣有个友人是报社总编辑，据他告诉微臣，他们的报社有个记者想写一篇有关王爷您的报导，但是这报导内容对王爷似乎……」

「说下去。」几乎是命令道。

「是……这报导的内容，大致上说在王爷您对现任太子的不满，还说您已於近日秘密找到悯显亲王，并将拥护悯显亲王为皇位继承人……王爷……这报导无论是否属实，想必都将对王爷的声望造成一定的影响……」

呵……这个白痴。

「所以？」

「这个……微臣已和那名记者谈过，劝他不要写这篇报导，但是……」

啓枫挑眉，等他继续说下去。

「小的实在是没有立场……但是……如果是身为王爷的丈人……」

总算是露出马脚了。

「所以你现在是在威胁我？」

「不……不是的王爷……这……」

「如果不想太难堪，在我把禁军叫来把你轰出g0ng廷之前，你现在马上给我滚。」既然已确认这老头的念头，不再给他说下去的机会，啓枫毫不留情面的赶人。

以这种愚蠢的方式来威胁他，霍老头啊霍老头，你真该庆幸你是活在21世纪，要是在旧时代，只怕你就算有十颗脑袋也不够砍。

霍丞狼狈的离开g0ng廷，两天後霍丞被以对皇室不敬之名废除子爵之位。

三天後，皇室正式宣布，承恩君董鄂永硕家的二格格兰熙为颖亲王妃的人选。因为t恤承恩君一次嫁两nv会感到不舍，所以先让啓枫与兰熙订婚，等啓枫高中毕业後再让他们举行大婚。

「最近累坏了吧？虽然不是大婚，订婚仪式也是很累的。」

与自己当初嫁入g0ng前一样，虽然只是订婚，兰熙仍是必须搬进别g0ng学习g0ng廷礼仪，因此这段期间只要时间上允许，紫曦就会来探望她。

兰熙摇头，甜甜的笑道，「不会啊，有姊姊来陪我，我一点都不觉得累。」

「哦，我看是因为有啓枫来陪着你吧？」紫曦故意开她玩笑。

「姊姊……」兰熙瞬间脸红。

起初，听到啓枫对长辈们说要娶兰熙为王妃时，紫曦自然是感到讶异的。因为兰熙从未向她说过与啓枫的关系。事後听着兰熙满脸幸福的述说，再从她几次来到别g0ng观察兰熙与啓枫的互动可以看得出来，啓枫对兰熙的心意是真挚的，这也就让她感到放心了。

「不管怎麽样，能够幸福我都会为你高兴的。来，这个给你。」紫曦从手提袋里拿出两条围巾，一条粉红se，一条暗红se，两条围巾的角落还各别绣上了l-c和q-f的英文字，那是兰熙和啓枫的名字英文缩写。

「这是送给你们的耶诞节礼物，也可以当作是你们的订婚礼物。」紫曦指着暗红se那条围巾，「这条就由你亲手交给啓枫。」今天是耶诞节，以往紫曦总会亲手做些小东西送给亲人朋友，今年成为太子妃的第一个耶诞节也不例外。

「谢谢姊姊。」兰熙满心欢喜的收下，即使每年都收得到姊姊的礼物，但每次收礼物的心情都像第一次拿礼物的心情一样开心。

「啓枫会来陪你吧？」当初在别g0ng学习g0ng廷礼仪的期间，陪伴她的除了服侍她的常在答应，就是她的书了。如今情形不同，兰熙住进别g0ng，除了她这个做姊姊的有时间就会来看她外，她那未来的未婚夫啓枫几乎是天天来，可以想见兰熙将来嫁给啓枫会是个幸福的小王妃。

「嗯。」兰熙点头，将紫曦送的围巾抱在怀里，「啓枫哥晚一点会来。」

她是世上最幸福的人了。

兰熙心想，有这麽疼ai她的姊姊，还有ai她的啓枫哥，她真的觉得好幸福，就是有着这样的幸福感支持，这阵子的辛苦又算得了什麽呢？

一开始，皇室对外宣布啓枫的订婚消息时她也吓了好一大跳，她喜欢啓枫，也明白啓枫对自己的心意，只是如此突然的宣布订婚消息仍是让她吓到了。

「我们从小就认识，除了对彼此深深的了解，还有就是对彼此的感情。」宣布订婚消息後的第二天，啓枫破天荒地接受媒t的访问，当记者问他会决定跟董鄂家二格格订婚的原因，啓枫充满坚定的回答。「所以，我很确信她是要与我共渡一生的nv孩。」

啓枫这段告白，不只深深感动了兰熙，也让一向给民众感觉神秘冷酷的二阿哥啓枫获得了“深情王子”的封号，人气也一夕之间b皇太子啓桓高出了许多。而即将成为皇室准王妃的兰熙，因为与太子妃紫曦是亲姊妹的关系，更是成为众所瞩目的焦点，八卦媒t也免不了的要将这两位妯娌加上姊妹的皇家媳妇b较一番。就目前媒t所做的民调来看，皇太子夫妇受到较年长一辈的民众喜ai，他们认为形象端庄聪慧的太子妃紫曦拥有作为一国之母的条件。而颖亲王这对准新人有如王子公主般地结合，则是让许多年轻人羡慕不已。

不过无论外界怎麽b较，都不会影响到她们的姊妹之情。

「姊姊，等会儿就一起吃晚餐吧。」

「不了。」紫曦笑着摇头，「我怎能做你和啓枫之间的“蜡烛”呢？这可是你们共同度过的第一个耶诞节呢。」

姊妹俩又聊了一会儿，直到啓枫来打了个招呼紫曦才离开。

看着平日总是冷着一张脸的啓枫，在面对兰熙时才会露出难得的笑与温柔，紫曦是真心的替兰熙高兴也为他们祝福。

出了兰熙的屋子，一gu冷飕飕的寒风迎面吹来，今晚很冷，但紫曦还不想这麽早回g0ng，因此兴起了逛西花园的念头，若她记得没错，别g0ng的花园里有一处种满了和承德别墅一样的菖兰花丛，虽然是冬天但也会被悉心照料着，所以她决定前往看看。

她喜欢菖兰，被厚重的j包围保护着的柔弱花朵，就像将外套衣领竖起半掩着脸庞的含蓄nv子，也像落入凡间而不知所措的羞怯天使。

前往别g0ng花园途中，紫曦低头看了一眼手上的手提袋，想起了一件事，於是拿出手机拨了一串号码──

「苍尧，耶诞快乐。」

紫曦清脆的声音与温煦的笑容仍停留在苍尧的脑海里。

收下围巾的一刹那，两人眼神相对，一gu无形的电流在两人之间流窜蔓延，紫曦那双乌溜溜的灵动大眼彷佛会说话似的就这麽盈盈的凝视着他，有那麽一瞬间，他真想不顾一切地将她紧紧拥入怀，告诉她自己就是她思念的啓枢，但最终理智仍是战胜了内心的yu念。

抚0着桌上那条蓝se围巾，他的心又不禁紧缩。

紫曦……我能ai你吗？

苍尧在心里不断问着。

「为什麽不能？」啓枫的话在他耳边响起，「毕竟你失去的已经太多了，拿回一样属於自己的，有什麽不行？」

啓枫的话没错，戊寅事件让他失去的岂是三言两语可道尽的？爸爸、妈妈、童年的快乐、幸福、甚至是皇位继承权……

这些原该是属於他的，却因为这场g0ng变，让他从身份尊贵的皇族阿哥，成为心里只有恨的复仇少年，这麽多年来，惟有藉着思念与回忆紫曦的心情，来让自己充满仇恨的生活里保有一丝丝温暖情感。

si去的父母亲是不可能再重生，时光也不可能让他再回到g0ng变前的无忧童年，而使他失去一切的就是皇位，也因此他更无心争取皇位继承权，至於紫曦……

这个让他心系多年的nv孩，他知道自己对紫曦的心意，如果真要讨回一样，他当然要紫曦！他的爸爸妈妈无法复活，他也不要皇位，他只要紫曦！但是他却不能这麽做，即使他知道紫曦的心里始终都挂念自己，他还是不能这麽做，因为这麽做会伤害到紫曦，他不能因为自己的私yu而让紫曦背负骂名，也不愿让一向疼ai自己的皇nn因为此事而伤心烦忧，更不希望因为自己的出现而让皇室再一次掀起皇位之争的sao乱。

所以，他只能选择以现在的身份──颖亲王的贴身侍卫，默默的守护他的至亲……默默的陪在紫曦的身边。

“今年的耶诞节你怎麽过呢？

我还记得去年的今天，

外头虽然下着雪，却因为有你的陪伴，我一点都不觉得冷。

今年少了你在我身边，除了无限的思念，还是无止尽的思念！

我的心也跟着降到无尽的寒冷境地。

不知你对我的思念，是否就像我对你的思念一样的深呢？

我多麽希望能够将对你的思念，化为羽，随着风，飘飞到你的身旁。

这样，就可以让你感受到我对你的思念。

我现在的心情真的很失落，

或许在别人的眼中，贵为这个国家的皇太子，倍受尊宠，又有个美丽聪慧的太子妃为妻，我应该是该满足的，但这一切的名利权位对我来说，都不能与跟你在一起相b，这才是我此生的心愿啊。

云漪，我ai你，我真的很ai你、很想你。

我一直以为自己可以忍，忍到与你再次重逢的日子。

但是，我现在发现我做不到了。

你可知道，这段见不到你的日子，不能将你拥入怀的日子，我有多难过？

现在，我只能靠看着你的相片来想你，

究竟何时才能再紧紧地抱住你呢？

云漪，我的ai，今生我是一定要跟你渡过了。

如果不能跟你一起，我的人生将会是灰暗的、没有意义的。

所以，云漪，我唯一的挚ai，你一定要等我。”

啓桓盯着电脑萤幕，认真的将信件打完後寄出，写信给云漪，是他每天必做的事。

他现在的心情，就像在信里所说的一样，他非常的想念云漪，见不到她，他的情绪是万分惆怅的，他每天每天都在想她，有时甚至会在夜里想她到流下泪水。

重逢的日子是何时呢？

应该不久了吧？

啓枫已经封为亲王，这就代表他和紫曦的约定可以实现了。

云漪，我们就快重逢了啊。

虽然如此，但是在还未真正在一起前，他终究是要藉由思念着她度日。

「唉……」轻叹口气，啓桓将视线移往一旁的桌上，桌上摆了个袋子，那是刚才曹内侍拿来的，说是紫曦送来的，啓桓走过去，好奇的打开袋子，拿出里头的东西。

是两条围巾，一条白se、一条淡紫se，还附了一张粉橘se纸条

“我知道你现在应该在和云漪聊sn或写信，所以就不打扰你了。

这两条围巾是我的一点心意，

另一条就让你亲手交给云漪罗！

耶诞快乐

紫曦”

看完纸条的内容，啓桓浅浅一笑，心里仍旧带着无奈。

紫曦……真是个聪慧的nv孩。

这段日子相处下来，他真的把紫曦当做贴心的朋友，甚至亲人。

他知道与紫曦离婚後宗亲们将会把责难归咎到紫曦身上，所以他暗下决定也算是接受了啓枫的提议，他不会把这个责任全部丢给紫曦，至少他也要减低这件事对紫曦的伤害，这是他唯一能为紫曦做的。

???「???母???亲???…???…???」

???紫???曦???从???睡???梦???中???惊???醒???，???望???着???四???周???，???知???道???自???己???是???在???景???祺???g0ng???才???明???白???刚???才???只???是???在???做???梦???。

???刚???才???梦???见???了???过???世???多???年???的???母???亲???，???梦???里???母???亲???一???直???望???着???她???不?????话???，???她???想???走???近???母???亲???，???母???亲???却???离???她???越???来???越???远???，???她???不???禁???想???着???母???亲???在???梦???里???看???着???她???的???眼???神???，???充???满???哀???伤???，???像???是???有???什???麽???话???要???对???她?????而?????不???出???口???。

???「???母???亲???，???您???想???对???我?????什???麽???呢???？???」

???侧???头???想???了???一???会???儿???，???忽???然???想???起???明???儿???个???是???母???亲???的???忌???日???，???母???亲???是???在???提???醒???自???己???去???看???她???吧???？

???第???二???天???，???由???苍???尧???陪???着???，???两???人???来???到???她???母???亲???的???墓???地???。

???「???对???不???起???，???没???有???告???诉???你???是???来???看???我???的???母???亲???。???」

???本???来???她???是???打???算???自???己???来???的???，???也???不???知???是???什???麽???原???因???，???临???出???门???前???她???突???然???想???到???苍???尧???，???虽???然???明???白???有???所???不???妥???，???但???她???仍???是???拨???了???通???电???话???给???苍???尧???，???在???电???话???里???没???明?????，???只?????希???望???他???陪???她???到???一???个???地???方???。???接???到???电???话???的???苍???尧???并???未???多???问???，???也???没???有???拒???绝???，???很???快???地???前???往???与???紫???曦???相???约???的???地???方???，???陪???着???她???来???到???她???母???亲???的???墓???地???。

???「???没???关???系???。???」???苍???尧???淡???淡???地?????。

???祭???拜???过???母???亲???後???，???他???们???来???到???一???处???亭???子???坐???着???，???起???初???两???人???都???未???开???口?????话???，???只???是???望???着???不???断???飘???落???地???面???的???白???雪???。

???「???知???道???为???什???麽???我???念???医???科???吗???？???」???最???後???，???是???紫???曦???先???开???了???口???。

???是???啊???，???他???记???得???小???时???候???她?????过???想???当???一???名???音???乐???家???。

???但???他???没???回???话???，???只???是???看???着???她???，???等???她?????下???去???。

???「???是???为???了???我???母???亲???。???」

???紫???曦???遥???望???远???方???，???开???始???幽???幽???地?????：

???「???我???母???亲???在???我???十???一???岁???那???年???患???了???重???病???，???不???到???半???年???就???过???世???了???，???那???段???接???受???治???疗???的???期???间???，???母???亲???受???了???很???多???苦???，???虽???然???当???年???的???我???才???十???一???岁???，???但???我???看???了???都???觉???得???好???心???疼???，???因???此???我???下???定???决???心???，???要???当???一???名???医???生???治???好???母???亲???的???病???，???只???是???这???个???愿???望???还???未???能???实???现???母???亲???就???过???世???了???。???所???以???这???让???我???更???加???想???当???医???生???，???既???然???无???法???救???自???己???的???母???亲???，???那???麽???我???就???要???救???别???人???的???母???亲???，???我???不???要???别???的???孩???子???和???我???一???样???从???小???就???失???去???母???亲???。???所???以???这???就???是???我???念???医???科???的???原???因???，???我???想???当???一???名???医???生???。???」

???「???你???母???亲???…???…???得???了???什???麽???病???？???」

???当???时???的???她???一???定???很???无???助???吧???？???遗???憾???的???是???他???无???法???陪???在???她???身???边???安???慰???她???。

???「???血???癌???。???」???这???是???她???嫁???入???g0ng???以???来???，???头???一???回???向???g0ng???里???的???人???提???起???母???亲???。

???「???母???亲???去???世???後???，???我???很???难???过???很???伤???心???，???但???是???我???却???不???能???表???现???出???来???，???因???为???我???还???必???须???负???起???安???慰???弟???弟???妹???妹???的???责???任???，???如???果???连???身???为???姊???姊???的???我???都???表???现???出???旁???徨???哀???伤???，???那???麽???兰???熙???和???幼???熙???又???该???怎???麽???办???呢???？???我???不???忍???心???在???爸???爸???失???去???妻???子???的???同???时???，???还???要???忍???着???伤???悲???安???慰???我???们???，???所???以???即???使???感???到???难???过???，???我???也???必???须???忍???着???，???我???…???…???只???能???在???心???里???流???泪???。???」

???这???就???是???紫???曦???，???无???论???受???到???什???麽???委???屈???，???无???论???心???里???身???上???受???到???什???麽???样???的???伤???痛???，???她???几???乎???不???在???人???前???哭???泣???流???泪???。???这???并???非???她???好???强???，???而???是???她???不???愿???因???为???自???己???的???泪???水???让???别???人???受???到???伤???害???，???就???像???当???年???在???御???花???园???里???摔???伤???，???他???知???道???她???很???疼???很???痛???，???却???仍???是???忍???着???泪???微???笑???，???这???也???是???让???苍???尧???心???疼???她???的???地???方???。

???「???如???果???不???介???意???，???你???…???…???可???以???在???我???的???面???前???流???泪???。???」

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???此???时???此???刻???，???他???真???恨???不???得???能???马???上???飞???到???云???漪???身???边???。

???原???本???，???他???预???定???一???月???中???就???要???前???往???法???国???，???是???在???长???辈???们???的???坚???持???下???他???才???留???到???农???历???年???後???。

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